I've talked about this girl before, maybe like last month even. but I have to say this and ask for your advice...
I was best friends w/ a girl since 7th grade. through the years we've grown apart for different reasons. I invited her to be one of my bridesmaids for my wedding. it was a last minute thing between hubby and I. We each had a friend who was fairweather and figured this would be the last straw--if either one bailed or didn't work out then we'd be done w/ them.
We've always wanted these two in our wedding (and actually thought when we were younger that these people would be best man/maid of honor contenders). Anyway--so the guy showed up and was there for Hubby's bachelor party, rehearsal dinner, bought the tux, and came to the wedding. My bridesmaid called me the night before the wedding and said she had to work and couldn't get out of it b/c she thought she had someone cover her shift (she's a nurse btw) but then that person called out sick and she was stuck. Now, I'm all for understanding people's situations, but last minute telling her was 6 weeks in advance. She had time to tell whomever she needed off. I found out she bought the dress, so she was doing stuff...but she never returned my calls in the weeks following up to the wedding about hair, nails, rehearsal dinner, bachelorette party, etc.
AFter the wedding, she never called to appologise or ask how it went, never sent a card, nothing. she called me 2 months after the wedding b/c another friend of mine told her off about not coming. She called me to yell at me about that--and I told her she was wrong, too. Now, her excuse in this was a) she had to work, and b) I didn't show up to her son's baptism when I was to be the godmother.
To my defense, this baptism thing--I called her 4x's to tell her I coudln't go and even left messages and she never returned my calls. She didn't tell me she was preg. w/ this kid till she was 7 months in..and to this day (the kid is now 1.5 years old) I've never even met the kid..ever, not even see him! I sent her a long winded email afterwards appologising and explaining myself which led to a few phone calls and her crying saying she was sorry. BUT, I never sent a card or formally appologised either for my actions.
She texted me this morning wanting to go to dinner this weekend. Should I go, or call it over with. I'm over the friendship, but i want to tell her exactly how I feel and have her know what she did was wrong, unacceptable, and b/c of those actions we're no longer friends. Am I wright, or am I just as wrong??
2 comments:
Beware of poisonous friendships.... and this one is toxic sweetie.. No friendship could cause you this much drama unless it's your BFF and she isn't, that's for sure. Keep stepping and let her cool her heels in you wake. :)
Your personality is a lot more different from mine. You are mellow, cool, calm and collected. I on the other hand, I am crazy wild and loud. That being said, I would have written her off long time ago. Now I am not you, so I cant really answer for you. But I can tell you to evaluate the situation and see how much she actually means to you. And if its very little, I would say “Write her off”
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